Friday, July 21, 2006

Quick! Where's the guacamole?

Everyone's familiar with the prank called TPing, right? It's where someone in the middle of the night flings rolls and rolls of toilet paper all over your house, your trees, your gardens...leaving quite a public display and mess. If you -- or the vandals -- are extra bad, plastic utensils are implanted throughout your lawn too. The kids call it "getting spooned."

Around here, I'm told, being the target of such a stunt is considered a badge of honor. At least in high school circles. In fact, some 'victims' get out their cameras, not as evidence for police but as additions to the family photo album.

So what, then, should we make of the fact last night we were "tortilla-ed"?

Apparently around here tortillas are thrown on hard-to-reach places, like rooftops, to melt, rendering them unremovable. In our case, the culprits decided to flank our car with the flour versions. Was it our motion-sensored flood lights that forced them to flee before the job's done? Were we targeted because of my husband's Mexican heritage? Or is this part of a hush-hush crime wave of tortilla assaults? A message from the illegals that live in our canyons? The Minutemen? For all I know, some doofus decided last night he only needed one tortilla from the package and thought our car the perfect place to fling the other seven.

This brand of vandalism isn't making me mad or making me laugh (anymore, at least). Now it's making me hungry.

19 comments:

Jessica Deline said...

Only in California would someone get "Tortilla-ed". Geesh.

LouBob said...

We've been papered and tomatoed, had piles of zuc's left in our truck and had grease paint applied to our windshield but the worse one was the goat that was put in our truck that we didn't discover until noon the nest day when she needed to me milked. Of course we probably had done a feew of the above to some of the vandalizers.

susie said...

Hmmm, we'll hope for the badge of honor slant, right? Hope you got 'em off early.

Joe said...

Hehe. Did you take a photo of it for the family album?

Robb said...

This is all new to me. I remember in my younger days TPing a buddy's car. Once, a bunch of us lifted it up and planted that same car bumper to bumper between two trees.

All in fun of course.

neese said...

how bizzare!

angie's pink fuzzy said...

never been tortillad. been TPed, bologna-d, spooned (and yes, it is a badge of honor), but tortillad? wow.

Firefly's Running said...

Wow! Now I heard everything.

Just12Finish said...

Oh yeah, when life gives you tortillas, make fajitas ...

Amy said...

Never heard of that either...

But here, peeps get Gritted (I don't know what the technical name is) but it's where they put uncooked grits on your lawn...when the dew settles they get soft and make a huge nasty mess....guess it's the Southern version of being Tortillaed....

Susan said...

? - tortilla-ed. I don't want any badges . . . did you get them all off the roof?

beansprout said...

Too funny in a strange kind of way! Enjoy the weekend and a nice batch of guacamole!

college kid said...

ha we were tortilla-ed

E-Speed said...

sounds strange. I hope the tortillas were easy to remove!

Rae said...

That's funny! I've never heard of being tortilla-d. We used to take Kool Aid and sprinkle it over lawns. When the dew comes overnight it dyes the lawn. Too fun!

pinaypower said...

what a waste of good california tortillas...we don't have the good ones out east.

backofpack said...

Never had that one. We've been tp'd and flamingo-d though. That's when pink plastic flamingos mysteriously appear all over your lawn during the night. It used to happen in our neighborhood on your birthday. By the way, around here the kids call the plastic utensil one "getting forked".

Painted Hand Farm said...

Would you believe that for once I've found decent avocados here in PA and last night we had guacamole venison burgers! So I've got the guac.

D said...

We were "signed" in addition to TP'd and "coned". We once woke up to construction signs littered on our grass. We once woke up to construction cones placed neatly throughout our front lawn. The first time we were TP'd I had a fit. Now I laugh about it. Thank God my daughter is now out of highschool.

Tortilla'd is definitely a new one!